Forgiven and Set Free

We will finish Ecclesiastes in the next few days, but today I’m going to pour out my heart and tell you about Post Abortion Syndrome (PAS).

It seemed like the best decision back then…it was a quick solution…besides, my life was just getting started and my whole future was ahead of me. So I had an abortion at sixteen years old, the whole teenage pregnancy problem was gone, and I resumed my life. Up until I became a born-again follower of Christ, I hid and suppressed any feelings or emotions from the abortion. It was out-of-sight, out-of-mind…so I thought.

Many years later, my husband and I were in church, and there was a guest speaker…a girl who told us of her experience at the local Crisis Pregnancy Center. She was determined to get an abortion. The people at the Pregnancy Center educated her on fetal development, and they also told her the truth about her baby…God’s truth. To make a long story short, she accepted Christ and chose life for her baby!

The entire time she was speaking, I felt this tugging on my heart. A voice inside was telling me, “You should be a part of this. You’ve had many experiences you can use to help guide and offer direction to these girls.” I knew I had just heard the Holy Spirit. So I followed the promptings, and signed up for training to be a volunteer counselor. During the first week of training we learned about abortion, and we graphically saw an abortion procedure. It was eighteen years later, but those feelings and emotions I had bottled up at sixteen, came to the surface. All I could think was, “How could I have done this to an innocent child?” It was then that I realized I had murdered my baby…

There is something very real that happens to you when you have an abortion…it’s called PAS (Post Abortion Syndrome). It may take years, but most of us who have had abortions share feelings of sorrow, anger, denial, guilt…etc. Satan absolutely uses this to keep us in bondage.The Bible tells us,

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousnesss.” 1 John 1:9

For years after having my abortion, I felt totally uncomfortable around anything pregnancy or baby related. I tried to avoid that stuff like the plague. Avoidance is another symptom of PAS. All volunteer counselors who, in the past, have had abortions were required to participate in a Bible Study specifically for PAS.
The Book we used was called FORGIVEN AND SET FREE. It was so incredibly healing… there were other women there. One particular scripture God had used to minister and heal me was from the book of Ezekiel…

“And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.” Ezekiel 36:26

The Bible study helped me to be confident of God’s forgiveness. That allowed me to forgive myself and move forward with my life. If you have had an abortion, and you are having a tough time with all the crazy, negative feelings associated with PAS, please call your local Pregnancy center…they will help you to really get it deep down inside of you…that you are forgiven and set free.