“Avoiding a fight is a mark of honor; only fools insist on quarreling.” Proverbs 20: 3
I think we all know them…people who argue just for the sake of arguing…people who just want to hear themselves talk…people who find it impossible to avoid strife. Maybe it stems from not being secure with themselves? Maybe they just like creating strife? I don’t know… but for whatever reason, it’s not a good characteristic to have. This verse in Proverbs actually gives them a name – FOOLS! The Bible tells me that a person who is truly confident of his or her strength does not need to parade it. A truly brave person does not look for chances to prove themselves. People who are genuinely capable can find a way out of a fight, and they can plainly avoid retaliating; these are men and women of character. What kind of person are you?
I remember one time I was caught up in the middle of a really stupid argument… I mean it was dumb and totally uncalled for. I drove up to a store and parked in a parking area that was crammed; it felt like I was in a sardine can. So I opened my door slowly, trying to be careful not to hit the car next to me (very difficult when you are wearing AFO’s – Ankle Foot Orthotics). Despite how careful I was trying to be, my car door nicked the car next to me… and I mean barely nicked (it clearly was not enough to do any damage). Next thing I know, this crazy man started yelling at the top of his lungs at me, blaming me for the many dents and dings in his car door that I obviously didn’t put there. But he was a person who just wanted to yell and cause trouble. Long story short, I called the cops so they could calm this crazy man down, and so they could file a police report. When the officer arrived, he obviously saw that there was no way I could have put so many dents in that man’s car door. It was so ridiculous. But the man kept insisting that I was the problem. The officer told me to just leave, showing his frustration at the whole incident. I tried to avoid fighting, I was quiet and I didn’t need to prove myself to this man. I didn’t need to prove my innocence. I believe that was a test of integrity – one of the many tests (of the past and the future) on my way of becoming a true person of character. Anyone can start a quarrel; to refuse to continue one takes courage and brings honor. I’m sure you have a story. Feel free to share it, I’d love to hear it and I’m pretty sure others would like to hear it too:)
“The godly walk with integrity; blessed are their children who follow them.” Proverbs 20: 7
Remembering that our decisions and manner of living will affect our children and grandchildren—either for good or bad—should encourage us to make wise and godly choices. As I type this, I am reminded of something that happened when I was a volunteer counselor at my local Crisis Pregnancy Center… I had finished my counseling session with one of our clients, and I walked backed to the waiting room with her so we could make a follow-up appointment for her with our receptionist. In the waiting room, I met her boyfriend (the father of her baby). I forget how, but we ended up talking about God. The boyfriend said, “It’s too late for me (to go to heaven), but maybe he (his son) will have a chance.” “What are you talking about?” I said. He told me, “I’ve messed up too much, I may as well give up.” “Wow,” I said, “Don’t you know… that’s why Jesus came! All of us have messed up. The Bible tells us we have all sinned and fall short of the glory of God. We need a Savior, and Jesus is it.” He was listening to me attentively, and I sensed his eagerness to hear more.
Isn’t God good? The Holy Spirit took over. I gave him a Bible and other literature. I just got finished ministering (or should I say… the Holy Spirit was ministering) to his girlfriend. And now her boyfriend got ministered to. I had to quit volunteering because of physical barriers, and I never seen that couple again. But seeds were planted. Isn’t that cool?
